FAQ/Fees
Gay Therapist NYC | Chronic Pain Therapist
How Do You Work with Clients in Chronic Pain?
Pain is a danger signal. Chronic pain means a chronic danger signal. So, healing is all about creating safety in the nervous system.
There are three parts to healing chronic pain. In therapy, we’ll focus on all three.
1 - The psychological work. Teaching your brain and your nervous system that it's safe to feel physical sensations. This is where we work on understanding, internalizing, and believing the accurate information about pain. There's nothing wrong with you. You can relax inside your body. And you can slowly reengage in activities you thought you had to give up.
2 - The emotional work. Teaching your brain and your nervous system that it's safe to feel your emotions. All of your emotions. Chronic pain is caused by the emotions you don't acknowledge, don't address, don't process, and don't feel. So we're going to feel them—and teach your brain that you can handle it.
3 - Patiently attuning to your true self. Teaching your brain and your nervous system that it's safe to be you. Learn to trust yourself, attune to yourself, align with yourself, and treat yourself with compassion. Feel into the true, unique animal of your body. That is you. Chronic pain is an invitation to learn your deeper truths and to get comfortable with who you really are.
These are the basic fundamentals. We'll work on all three together... and your pain will start to recede.
Logistics & Fees
Offering weekly individual psychotherapy. Appointments with me are scheduled in ongoing slots that repeat each week.
Appointment length: 45-50 minutes
Appointment fee: $200
A sliding fee scale is available on a limited basis. If you need the sliding scale, please contact me and we can discuss your fee.
Location: appointments take place online via telehealth. You get to choose any comfortable and private space for your therapy sessions.
Contact me to request a free phone consultation.
How Long Does It Take To Heal Chronic Pain?
We all wish I had a satisfying answer.
In my phone consultations, this is the most frequently asked question. And there’s no one-size-fits-all. But here’s what I say:
Everyone’s process is different, and there’s no clearly predictable timeline. But—give it 3 to 6 months of committed, dedicated, thoughtful work, and we should see a shift. Some people improve significantly in a short time. Others get little glimmers and signs that they’re on the right track.
It may take time, but don’t let that hold you back from starting.
This will work. It’s just a matter of understanding and internalizing a sense of safety with 1) the body, 2) the emotions, and 3) the true self. It’s not easy, but at least it’s simple.
But Therapy’s Expensive…
Yes, for many people—and many budgets—psychotherapy is expensive. Let’s not beat around the bush about that. If finances aren’t a concern for you, great. You can skip this section. If you’re like me, however, I recommend you read on.
This is a two-parter.
Part 1. It’s possible that out-of-pocket therapy is entirely too expensive for you right now. I respect that. That’s okay. You deserve this healing information either way. That’s why I, and so many other mind-body practitioners, provide free or very low-cost educational and self-help resources. Listen to my podcast. Check out the Other Resources section at the bottom of this page. There’s so much great content. And people can heal entirely independently. Many people do. It’s your brain and your nervous system. You, ultimately, have the power.
And…
Part 2. Your first instinct might be, “I can’t afford this.” But your truth, if we dig deeper, is that you don’t prioritize your inner self. This is very common for TMS patients. You’ll “push” yourself, you’ll “perfect” yourself, you’ll “better” yourself, you’ll certainly make space for others, but you don’t really cater to you. The core of you, the animal of you, your inner child, your deeper needs and desires. You’re like me. You enter the party through the side door, pull off your rainboots (cuz you walked), avoid the ticketed area (cuz it’s expensive), and side-step your way through life. You wouldn’t allow yourself to be driven up in a Rolls-Royce, walk in through the front door, get the full-price ticket, and just enjoy the party. I get that, because, same. You reach toward the bottom shelf for the cheap deals rather than just allowing yourself to grab the one you know you’ll like the best.
But what if a part of you, a part deep inside you, needs more?
What if you need to start learning how to treat yourself well… for your own health?
I know it’s hard to believe you deserve to spend good money on you. But that thought process isn’t really about the cost. It’s about you. For me, I never want to be greedy, and I never want to be self-indulgent, but I’ve slowly grown to understand that, yes, I think I’m worth a nice, solid investment. And that feels good. My body has thanked me for—finally—learning how to honor and take care of myself. It’s been a fundamental part of my pain recovery.
So, for you, I’d encourage you to ask yourself, is your inner self worth it? To have a TMS therapist help you? And help you with something that really matters? Like I said, it took work for me to get here. But now I know, I can spend money on me when I need it. And I invite you to think about what you need—for you.
And I know. It’s all terrible. Capitalism and *the economy* and worth and money and guilt and inequity and “deserving” and the wealth gap and… I know. It’s terrible.
But you deserve help—for you—when you need it.
Other Resources
It’s important to learn about the mind-body connection. This understanding is a key part of the psychological work. Your brain and nervous system will calm down as you learn more about mind-body healing and integrate the information into your lifestyle. As the brain and nervous system relax, the physical symptoms abate. Here's a list of resources, books, websites, podcasts, videos, and all the stuff that'll help you.